The Family Roles

   This week in my family class we discussed the rules and roles of the family. In The Family: A Proclamation to the World, it reads: “HUSBAND AND WIFE have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. “Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalm 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners.”

   

    These paragraphs in the Proclamation outline the roles of mothers and fathers. They are to love their children and teach them well. In the family different systems and patterns emerge. There a four main systems in the family: System Theory, Exchange Theory, Symbolic Interaction, and Conflict Theory. System theory is the theory of the family working to accomplish goals. This theory works best when there are rules and roles. Exchange theory is the theory that focuses on doing something to get something out of it. Symbolic theory focuses on non-verbal communication. The final theory is conflict theory. This theory uses power to gain influence. Each of these theories is effective in one family or another, sometimes more than one theory can work.

   

   An example of systems theory is everyone in the family working together to get somewhere on time. An example of exchange theory could be if you do the dishes this time, you won’t have to do them again for another week. An example of symbolic interaction can be when mom gives “the look.” When we see this look we know to obey whatever, mom says. An example of conflict theory is the older sibling using its power to influence the younger ones. As we have already discussed the family is the most important unit. It is ordained of God.

   

   In the family each member has a role. They have the role of brother, sister, mother, father, and child. Within these roles are a set of rules. These rules determine how the person in their role behaves. Another topic discussed was the relationship of the family, and each individual’s relationship to others in the family. In class we looked at a concept called family mapping. Family mapping is the process of drawing a map of the family, starting with the parents. Once we establish the type of relationship mom and dad have, we can start mapping the relationship of the children to the parents and each other. This concept is very helpful in seeing the dynamics in the family. As we try to understand the roles and rules of the family we can better understand and accomplish the goals Heavenly Father has for each family.

Family

   The Family: “God gave us families to help us become what he wants us to be. This is how he shares his love, for the family is of God’’. I love this quote because it reminds us why we have families and why they are so important. The family is of God. As human beings we have a basic need/want to belong, to fill this need we have families. The term family is defined as: A primary social group and their offspring. However, as times change we see this definition of family being blurred.

  In our world today, a family can consist of single parents and their children, two people of the same gender and their children, or blended families. When did the family change? I feel to understand this question we must first go back to the beginning. Since the beginning of time families have existed. Families made societies. This is especially true during the “baby boom”. The baby boom took place after WWII, with 3.7 children born to the average family. By the end of the baby boom 77.3 million babies were born in the U.S. and 450 million babies worldwide.

   In 1968 “The Population Bomb” came out. In the book, Dr.Ehrlich argues there are people starving and in some countries there is the problem of over population. He focuses on the ethics of having so many children and the emphases on environmental resources. There is degradation. He asks the question of what kind of world are our children going to live in, and what effect will that have in generations to come? The book influenced common views by having us assume the population will always grow. The book also influenced us to believe that population growth at the rate it was going would be bad. These views are still widespread, as more and more people around the world aren’t having children and the world population is declining.

     A TV special called “The New Economic Reality” takes a look at the effects families are having on the economy, both in the United States and around the world. Three important concepts focused on by the video were Population, Fertility Rates, and Birth Rates. Population is the total number of people living in a region.  Birth Rates is the number of births per 1000 people born in a population during a year. Fertility Rates is the average number of children born over the lifetime of the average mother. Over the last few decades the population has been going up, while the birth and fertility rates have gone down. Why is this?

    The first thing to notice and that the program points out is people are now living longer. This may not seem a big deal, but as people began living longer they had less children to replace them. A whole generation can be gone in a matter of years because people aren’t having kids.

   Other reasons birth and fertility rates are plummeting is families now say they can’t take care of more than one or two children, they don’t see the value in having a big traditional family, and others want to focus on careers. While taking care of children can be expensive, and while it is a good reason not to have a bigger family, it should not be the only reason. In the scriptures we learn that God will provide for every needful thing.

     Careers are important. Careers exists to help us make a living. When it comes to careers let us hope we all find something we want to do for a living otherwise our “careers” become our jobs, something we have to do, not something we want to do. It is important to remember why we have careers: to take care of our families.

   The argument that there is no value in a big traditional family was also addressed in the video. The documentary interviewed a number of people on the street and asked them their opinions on the traditional family. Some of the responses were: Having a big family is not important, it isn’t modern, and we don’t need traditional families anymore, while others are still trying to figure it out. When asked if the family was important in general the answers were different variations of yes. Almost all of them agreed that family is the main support group. Everyone is entitled to their opinions. In my own opinion I think it sad others don’t see the value of families as we see it.

We as members of The Church Of Jesus Christ Of Latter-day Saints see families as sacred gifts from God. In The Family: A Proclamation to the World it says: “Marriage is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of his children.” I love my family. I love what they do for me. They, along with Heavenly Father make me the person I’m meant to be.

   When generations pass and these standards, or lack of, standards, become the norm and they lose touch with the ways things used to be. This new way becomes the new norm.

life

My name is LiMing. I am from West Virginia. I'm studying international studies with the hope of being a translator interpreter and journalist. I love my family!!! I'm the youngest of three. One of my favorite things to do with my family is travel to new countries. I also love to read, write, and do karate. I'm excited about this semester because of what I'll learn in my classes and from other people.